I now have two blogs - this one and the Montreal Gazette blog - and it hasn't taken long for the two to overlap, because I wanted to share the Andre Dawson piece posted here yesterday with Gazette blog readers who might have missed it. However, in this era of intellectual property rights, I also thought it best to play it safe from a legal perspective, so I've decided to sue myself for copyright infringement. The following is a transcript of the courtroom exchange between LM (lawyer me), DM (defendant me) and JM (Judge me):
LM: Can I state my name for the record?
DM: Ted Bird.
LM: And how long have I been blogging?
DM: I guess about two weeks now.
LM: Am I being financially compensated?
DM: That's none of my business.
JM: Overruled. Whether or how much I earn from blogging is only relevant if I'm found liable for damages from theft of intellectual property, and that hasn't been established.
LM: Did I come up with the title "Bird Droppings"?
DM: I know very well I came up with it. I don't even know why I'm asking me that.
LM: Why have I decided to maintain two blogs?
DM: Well, the personal blog is just that - something I'll use to relate my personal experiences, while I envision the Gazette blog as leaning more towards topics of interest to a broader audience, but the two could cross over every once in a while, if I follow what I'm saying.
LM: Oh, I know exactly what I'm saying. I'm stealing from Peter to pay Paul.
DM: I don't even have Pay Pal.
LM: Pay PAUL.
JM: I've had just about enough of me. Case dismissed.
LM: But My Honor...
JM: That's 100 dollars for contempt of court. Would I like to try for 200?
LM: I'll see me in appeals court.
DM: Not if I see me first.
Take that, John Grishman.