Monday, December 17, 2012

No gluten for Juice Newton Hooten(and other Monday morning musings)

There were several statement wins on Week 15 in the NFL, but none more emphatic than Atlanta's 34-0 win over the defending Super Bowl champion New York Giants. The one-sided whipping all but clinched a number one playoff seeding for the Falcons, whose season-long invincibility at home makes them the theoretical - if not the practical - favorite to represent the NFC in the Super Bowl. The Giants, meanwhile, played like they've already booked their January vacations, slipping into a three way tie for the lead in a weak division they could have clinched weeks ago with any kind of consistency...Whether or not Minnesota makes the playoffs, the NFL MVP race turned into a no-brainer yesterday. Adrian Peterson's season-best 212 rushing yards in the Vikings' win over the Rams put Peterson within striking distance of Eric Dickerson's single-season rushing record and Minnesota in the thick of the NFC wild card race. All of that on a team otherwise devoid of offence, allowing opposing defences to load up for Peterson, who shreds them anyway...So, it's not that Toronto isn't a CFL town - it's not a football town, period. Fourteen thousand empty seats for the Bills and Seahawks in a market of 5.5 million should tell the NFL everything it needs to know about Canada's largest city as a potential expansion market...Kudos to ESPN for recognizing there are limits to an ethnic group's license to mock its own. Suspending columnist Rob Parker for saying Robert Griffin III doesn't embrace his blackness enough sends a strong and appropriate message about racism and the acceptable boundaries of journalistic debate...If pop singer Juice Newton married retired baseball pitcher Burt Hooten, played trumpet in a college football band, inherited a billion dollars and developed a wheat allergy, she'd be rootin' tootin' high-falootin' Juice Newton Hooten, sans gluten. No need to thank me; it's all a public service.

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